Am.I.Very.Far?

Step by step, we're getting there.

You go, Chinese rapper.
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amiveryfar
I like the part where he screams.


Writer's Block: Happy happy joy joy
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amiveryfar
What cheers you up the most when life gets you down?

The perfect question for this weekend. :) Today was a bit rough, but it's okay now because I've got awesome plans for tonight. I'm going to go for a lovely evening walk and then work on some graphic design, maybe study some GRE vocabulary or start working on learning the brain, since I have Physiological Psychology coming up next term. There are few things that make me feel better than being productive; it works so well. It gets my mind off the task and it reminds me that life goes on. And even better, I get to bask in that warm, awesome feeling of accomplishment afterward. 



Just something I've been thinking about.
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amiveryfar
 I'm starting to get why people get so worked up over Jesus. I mean, here's this dude, 100% perfect and pure, but totally forgiving and willing to die for people way worse than him. How many of us can forgive even the tiniest things? Until I found myself in similar circumstances, I couldn't forgive wrongs against me. And yet, Jesus could and did. He understood and forgave, and that was that. It's not really amazing until you try to do it yourself.

I don't know if I'm becoming more 'Christian', per se, but I feel myself really warming up to Jesus. 

Hey, how ya doin', Captain Obvious?
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amiveryfar
So, I'm at work, writing a summary of the WCAG 2.0 guidelines. Basically, by following the guidelines, we can design websites to help disable people, like blind people using screen readers, use our website.

I'm reading through the official document, and find this:

Seizures
Guideline 2.3: Do not design content in a way that is known to cause seizures.

Um, crap. No seizures? That totally ruins the entire design concept! Dang. </sarcasm>

For those who are alone.
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amiveryfar
 A beautiful poem.


Carrots <3
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amiveryfar
Thank you to newinmyhometown . <3 You're a sweetheart. You know why. ;D

So, my burst of emoness has died down and the sunshine is all bright and sparkley again. I'm usually pretty cheerful, but I guess I have a tendency to get really down in the dumps sometimes, especially about my relationships, since I'm pretty insecure about them.

I'm eating carrots like a maniac. You have no idea. I have this huuuuge bag and and and it's so good! So crunchy and magical. :3

I went to the most amazing BBQ this weekend~

It was hosted by a friend of Neethan's. :D There were tons of people there, so I didn't talk to the host a ton, but he gives the vibe of a really upstanding sort of guy, you know?

BUT ABOUT THE BBQ. The guy hosted it at his cottage, which is basically three or eighty times bigger than my house. And he had a little pond/lake on his property

and an island

and a bridge to said island

covered in pretty jellybean lights!

So basically, it was amazing. He cooked everyone burgers and there was soccer and board games and chit-chatting and smores and boat rides and frogs and giant koi fish and snapping turtles and everything wonderful.

So basically what I'm saying is that I really want to go camping, pronto. 

Behold, TECHNOLOGY.
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amiveryfar
Because getting your own beer is just too darn hard.

We clearly need a robot for this task.


Peace of mind
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amiveryfar
You know, this sounds really mushy-gushy and New Agey, but hate is just such a pointless thing. People will do bad things, maybe even terrible things, but most of the time, the things they do are totally understandable, when you look at who that person is, their situation, their context. Everyone may not be created equal, but no one was ever created perfect, either. We all have our flaws to overcome and our own crap to deal with, and sure, we make mistakes, but ultimately, most people are just trying their best.

I don't know. But the more I look at someone's situation and the stakes for them, the less able I am to look negatively at them or judge them.
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Hey internets!
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amiveryfar
Finally back to LJing after a fairly epic hiatus. The whole break up thing was kinda world shattering, as lame as that sounds. Still not totally over everything, but I'mma gettin' there. Thank you to everyone who helped me through it. <3

Right now I'm on a co-op term at school, so I'm a'workin' and making money and stuff. I have an office with a door with my name on it and everything! How fancy is that? :D :D :D

I'm seeing a new guy named Neethan and he's pretty much amazing. One of those whole package kinda guys: smart, funny, sweet, humble, loyal, considerate, all of that. It's hard adjusting to the new relationship, considering I still have strong feelings for Dan, but I'm trying to just ease myself into things.

Oh, and I have a Nintendo DSi so that I can become a Pokemon Master! Gonna catch 'em all! Heck yes.

Er, kind of dull post, but I gotta get back into the swing of this. So... Hi everyone. Thanks for not deleting me off your flists. :D
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wtf this isn't my life
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amiveryfar
I don't understand how things got so complicated. I mean, I can look back and think about the series of events, but it feels surreal and impossible. How am I here? I have two weeks to think, but it's maddening. It's hard to think about anything else.

I was an idiot. Because it didn't seem possible, I didn't stop it when I could have. I had this idiotic impression that it was something other people do, but not me.

I can't make this right, but I'm trying to do the best I can to never repeat that mistake.

When it comes to relationships, I've never been in a situation where I had power. And now I have it, but I want to get rid of it so so badly. Can't someone else make this decision for me?

I'm gonna go and be real melodramatic here, but man, I feel like jumping off a bridge would be easier than making this decision. Just end it all and then there's no mistake to make, right?

I guess in summary I want to have my cake and eat it too. Om nom nom.

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